Saturday, September 27, 2014

Still here

They are the only inhabitants of their planet. No other life form exists. They survive by breathing an atmospheric gaseous concoction not dissimilar to our own, and thankfully my respiratory apparatus is functional.

They do not communicate by speech, but rather by some form of telepathic interchange. There is full transparency, and no secrets can be withheld from each other.

This presents a problem when they wish to engage in recreational activities such as poker. Which brings me to the reason why I'm here...

Monday, September 08, 2014

Out of This World

I have no idea why and how they singled out my blog from all the millions in the blogosphere. By "they", I am referring to the aliens from the Messier 109 galaxy, who beamed me up into their waiting spaceship on the night of August 26th, while on my way home from another losing 1/3 session at the Aria.

They were very courteous, apologized profusely for the abrupt interruption in my life, assuring me that it was a matter of critical importance to the survival of their civilization. Their leader is called 助ជួយляйלعدة, which to earthlings would sound something like gohfzhmmb.

What am I doing here? When will I return? More in an upcoming post. And yes, they do have the technology to post to Blogger from 85 million light-years away, but if I told you how, they would cut off my 계란గుడ్లు.