Deja vu

Sunday night and another sea of red as Asian markets plunge, setting the tone for Europe to continue the freefall, leaving the American markets little choice. My disposable income was non-existent even before this crisis, but I imagine that many people will be starting to feel the effects of this global squeeze, meaning less visits to Vegas, Atlantic City and Monte Carlo.

So what does a poker player do? Organize home games of course! It is an economically attractive alternative to casino patronage, and all the requisites for setting yourself up can be found on one website, Nevada Jacks. Poker cards, table covers, poker tables, quality poker chips can all be ordered here at very cheap prices. And the chips are true clay poker chips, with the same quality and materials as used by many Las Vegas casinos. So what are you waiting for? Take advantage of the great customer service and top-class products found at Nevada Jacks and set yourself up for the ultimate home game experience. Your friends will thank you for it.

Man of the Year 2008 - Senator Bill Frist

A little early, I know, but I can't see anyone surpassing the uncanny foresight of Bill Frist, who anticipated the immense global financial threat posed by the unregulated credit default swap market online poker industry, and helped prevent an international meltdown with the introduction of critical pre-emptive legislation.

We owe our collective jobs, homes, retirement benefits and general sense of economic well-being to this great fucktard visionary.

LeTune follows LeCheese

15 minutes to the start of LeTune Challenge I, a freeroll for bloggers courtesy of Joe from RakeBrain. I was fortunate enough to be invited again, thank you Joe and RakeBrain.

(40 minutes later .... )

I was eliminated in 24th place. I have no business playing PLO. What was really frustrating was that Full Tilt does not allow chat if you have no real money balance, which I don't. So if I didn't say hi to you, or didn't respond to your greetings, this is why :

Bob Lassiter (tampa)

If anyone is to blame for this blog, it is Bob Lassiter. It was he who encouraged me to start this little venture. Exactly two years have flown by since his passing and I still miss the bastard.

The new glossary of Wall Street terminology

After a series of calamitous days on Wall Street, I sit here watching the Nikkei and other Asian markets continuing the freefall in order for Wall Street to get an inkling in which direction to trade tomorrow morning. In the meantime, I am brushing up on the latest vernacular:


BULL MARKET - A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.


BEAR MARKET - A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.


VALUE INVESTING - The art of buying low and selling lower.


P/E RATIO - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.


BROKER - What my broker has made me.


STANDARD & POOR - Your life in a nutshell.


STOCK ANALYST - Idiot who just downgraded your stock.


STOCK SPLIT - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.


FINANCIAL PLANNER - A guy whose phone has been disconnected.


MARKET CORRECTION - The day after you buy stocks.


CASH FLOW - The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.


YAHOO - What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.


WINDOWS - What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @$240 per share.


INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR - Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.


PROFIT - An archaic word no longer in use.

The blame game

In written testimony to a congressional panel submitted today, a former chief executive of AIG blamed its woes on shorts. Yeah, like it's the dealer's fault that I got rivered. That dick Fuld from Lehman also appeared arrogant and unrepentant at yesterday's hearing.

These guys should be taken 30,000 feet up in a plane, and then offered the choice between their golden parachute and a real one.

"Poker Fiction"

Poker Grump, a Las Vegas-based prolific and high-quality blogger, has been obsessively picking apart erroneous ESPN "Poker Fact" segments. So it was somewhat surprising that we were not privy to one of his posts after yesterday's "Poker Fact" declaring that "72 offsuit was the worst starting hand in hold'em".

Absent any other assumptions (and there weren't any), 32 offsuit is the worst hand. I'm thinking hot and cold Sklansky-Chubukov, and not a limit hold'em simulation with betting on all streets.